On May 18, 2019, I was ordained as a Permanent Deacon for the Diocese of Fall River along with eight classmates. After being ordained at Holy Mass, each of us knelt before the bishop who placed the Book of the Gospels in our hands while speaking these words, “Receive the Gospel of Christ whose herald you have become. Believe what you read, teach what you believe, and practice what you teach.” As I reflect on my first year as a deacon in the Catholic Church, I ponder these words and reflect on the challenges, surprises and blessings that this year has brought.
The challenges of this first year have come as I have tried to meld my life as a deacon with that of husband, father, brother, son and executive. The free time is there, but am I spending it in the right place and on the right things? Answering that question thoughtfully, is often a challenge for me.
Further challenges were brought as I was assigned to a parish different than the one my family had known and loved for many years. This assignment then expanded within one month of my arrival, when my new parish was combined with two other parishes as a collaborative, neither of which had a deacon. The parishioners of the collaborative were welcoming and wonderful, if a bit mistrusting in what the new collaborative structure would mean for them and their home parishes. Next came the unexpected departure of a beloved pastor, who was also the moderator of our collaborative, followed by a continued uncertainty as to whether he would return. Next came the pandemic which changed all of our lives and how we worship, if only temporarily. I am currently awaiting the arrival of the locusts, though I am told they are not expected until next year. When I reflect on these challenges, it seems unbelievable that they all would have taken place in the first year of my diaconate journey.
As for surprises, I could not be more humbled with the vulnerability, strength, faith, appreciation, selflessness, sense of service and love shown by the people of our collaborative. To be able to share in their joy, their sadness, their lives and to see how quickly they would accept me into them has been surprising and rewarding and I am so grateful for that. One thing I did not learn in formation, but certainly did in my first year as a deacon was that people will say things to you, that they will not just say to anyone and in some cases may not say to anyone else in their lives. The request for a blessing, the request for a prayer, the chance to share a hurt, a regret, a long pondered, troubling question, a complaint that they prefer not to communicate directly to father, the list goes on. I am continually surprised by the trust and great care they show to me.
In terms of blessings, it has been a source of great joy to welcome many new children into the church through the Sacrament of Baptism. It has been fulfilling to reflect on the Gospel and preach on a regular basis, in a voice sympatico with our priests, but with the tone of a deacon, with one leg in the world and one leg in the church. Presiding over wake services and Funerals outside of Mass has been a tremendous blessing. To serve as an emissary of Christ, to bring comfort and peace to a family in this context may very well be our most rewarding service as a deacon. To serve regularly at Holy Mass, to pray, preach and act as an Ordinary Minister of Communion and to preside at Holy Hours have also been tremendous blessings.
Reflecting on the words of the bishop from last May, I pray that I can become an even better, more useful herald of the Lord. I commit myself to love people to the best of my ability and to be the person God’s people need me to be, praying with and for them through challenges, recognizing the surprises that this life brings to all of us and cherishing the blessings our God so desperately wants us to have. I am grateful to serve as a deacon and ask for your prayers for me to be more closely aligned to Christ the servant as this journey continues.
